We went out to buy some MORE school books yesterday afternoon . . . .after a long and serious talk between Christian and I about how hard things are here, how useless we feel unable to speak the language, how all the changes and stresses of the past 4 years have taken a HUGE toll on our family, yet we are committed to what ever God has for us . . .his best doesn't always come in the package we want to see . . . . So we talk to the kids about some issues happening in our family. Christian and I repent of our own selfishness and anger and then we get ready and head out the door. when we left it was light out. We were gone for about 4 hours. We walked all over the city to find the book stores we needed, we went out for dinner (did I mention most of the city, including our house, was out of water all day which was one of the main reasons we went out . . . no water= no flushing, handwashing, clean dishes, or cooking) so we ate out and then decided to have a treat somewhere because the afternoon was going great . . different than how it has been for a while. We ran to the pharmacy to get vitamin C and then to the grocery store to get yogurt for breakfast. we caught a taxi home and when we got there Christian opened the big wooden door in our front wall (can only be opened w/a key, no latch on the outside) our front and back doors were open, the backdoor was open and all the lights were on.
The kids and I immediately went to Scott and Meghan's and the taxidriver called the police. (we are using their computer to post this.) Christian and Scott went into the house and our computers were gone, the bedrooms ransacked, otherdoors kicked in and broken. Our cash was gone, they took our propane tank, and tried to take the T.V. It looks like they were spoked away because they didn't take the mp3 players from Gabe's room and they didn't get the cable disconnected. All of my jewlery is gone. Stuff I saved from high school, stuff my Gram gave me, my mom's wedding rings, the piece glass from C's first car that I unknowing had carried around for years before I met him (some of you know that story) anyway . . stuff that is meaningless to others but the only stuff I have saved through all of our moves. Our computers were important but they are replaceable, the photos on the computer and on the camera are not replaceable. Christian's backpack is gone too - they probably took it to carry the computers and will have found out later that our camera and my mp3 player were in there.
They pushed in our gatedoor (how w/o being seen baffles me) then they climbed in the den window (at least two of them, one had to lift the other) then they opend the kitchen door, took the computers, someone went out back and kick in a door - -there was nothing out there to find, someone ransacked our room, papers and underwear everywhere. they found the cash but left credit cards, banking info and didn't find the passports - amazing. They attempted to find things in the kids rooms but gave up fast. I'm sure they were dissappointed by our entertainment center that was full of books and card games. Some how they missed the playstation and our CD's.
Christian and I have to go home and clean up the house while the kids go to church w/Scott and Meghan. We don't want them to see their stuff like that, and there are 36 hours of dirty dishes I haven't had water to wash and our landlord could come from Lima anytime today.
God challenged me long ago about my faith - if he were to take something from me, even a child, would I still bless his name . . .I really struggled witht that question. Can I? Should I? I resolved that night 3 years ago that I would. I can trust that God loves me and my family more than I ever could or will. I CAN TRUST HIM. But I can be sad too. We were reading and thinking about Job this morning . . .Job I am not. God thought highly of him and blessed him even more after all his loss, but you can't tell me Job didn't have a huge pain in his heart from the loss he suffered. I thought that last week was the hardest yet. . . but it got harder. Christian is handling all of this amazingly well. If you knew him years ago when his GSX-R was stolen you would be amazed at how God has strengthened him. I am a wreck - I am sad - I find my self wondering what is next. I know that to know the Lord in all his Glory I must also know him in his suffering - but as I said last night -" knowing the suffering sucks" I trust my God, he will bring us through, but knowing him doen't mean a perfect life - it means peace in the turmoil, it means hope when hope makes no sense, it means having a God you can cast all your care, angst, anger, and fear upon.
we are thankful that it wasn't worse and that no one was hurt, but we are also reminded that personal safety is not guarnteed, nothing is for sure except for our creator. God is just as good and in control as he was yesterday morning. The Lord gives and takes away and we will choose to bless his name.